There are many pieces of advice that us, women, wish we would have been given in our early youth, like: how to choose a partner wisely, how to deal with breakups, how to pick the right bra… or how to live by yourself and enjoy it. Many of us tend to have conflicting thoughts on living solo, but dear comrade, you are not alone.
In my late 20s and after years of flat sharing, I started considering the so called ‘solo life’. I was very attracted to the idea of not having to share my personal space anymore, as well as being able to materialize my ‘Dream Home Ideas’ Pinterest board. But it just seemed toooo overwhelming.
As I was wishing for some sort of divine help, I came across a book called ‘Live Alone and Like It’, written by Marjorie Hillis - the editor of Vogue - circa 1936. The book was addressed to the new social category: single or bachelor ladies who lived on their own, and most likely, didn’t like it. And even though this book was written in the 30s, a lot of it holds true today.
Yet it is time to have a more updated manual for the 2022 live-aloners, or more than a manual, a collection of suggestions that I do hope make the sound of solo living appealing to you. Let’s go.
1) Decor matters (and your mattress too)
This might seem too obvious, yet we sometimes (probably out of laziness or a tight budget) overlook the importance of a nice decor. And here we are not talking about decor in general, but a decor that screams YOU.
Living in a space that resonates with who you are will make you feel happier, it will also give you a feeling of home and even safety. This doesn’t mean you have to pick every single piece of furniture or item in your house, but bringing with you a few cherished items such as a vase, a cushion or lamps might already make a space feel like you.
Comfort is ESSENTIAL too. Investing in a comfortable mattress might be one of the best things you can do. Remember this is your temple, your refuge, so you want to feel relaxed and rested when you are home.
2) Become self-reliant
The scariest thing about living alone is probably having to deal with everything by yourself. And for other people, it is the lack of company or not having someone to talk to when they get home. But these are issues that you can work on and progressively cultivate an independence that will make you grow as a person. Learning to do things by yourself, as well as acknowledging when you need help and asking for it, or being at ease with your own company, are some of the most valuable learnings that the solo life will bring.
3) You are not an island
Cultivating independence doesn’t mean you are living on an island and you must do it all alone. You will actually enjoy the peace and quiet of your home way more when you have a social circle you belong to. Having a healthy balance of socializing and alone time is one of the secrets to a successful solo life.
Personally, I also find that sharing my home with the people I love makes the solo experience way better. Host a dinner party from time to time, plan movie or game nights and feel like the perfect host.
4) Enjoy the perks of living solo
And of course: learn to appreciate the benefits of living alone! From living in a space decorated by yourself, for yourself, to having TOTAL freedom and privacy to do or watch whatever you want (hello, guilty pleasure shows) to simply living by your own rules.
As a woman living the solo life who is about to build her new table, and to quote the book that inspired me to write this article, I say: LIVE ALONE, AND LOVE IT.
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